Two Steps Ahead? More Like Two Feet In The Grave!
May 31, 2016 18:04:56 GMT -6
Drew Stevenson, ΒΑЯЯЕԼ, and 1 more like this
Post by Theo Vega on May 31, 2016 18:04:56 GMT -6
Sunny Havana, Cuba. Theo Vega, the Eraser as a few have dubbed him lately with his knack for eliminating Tracy Race and Logan Brock from MSW after inflicting a series of injuries could be seen walking the white sand beaches with a pair of Latin beauties escorting him; one for each arm. The sun glistened off his gold chains and chest as he was oiled down with a decent tan to boot, all natural too; no spray-paint tans for the Sin City Slicer. He clearly appeared to be enjoying himself while the rest of his fellow brothers in the Capital Crew remained stateside. Normally it'd be a bit difficult for an American to visit Cuba even with the embargo lifted, especially outside of business but his heritage did afford him a few benefits. On the last Unstoppable he nearly erased Duke Andrews from MSW as well but the veteran targeted him several days ago on a video released on MSW.com in an act of defiance. Bold move, not smart, but bold nonetheless. Honestly he expected to get a call from IC3's pet gorilla, “Dr.” Vic, or a press release of some sort stating that Duke Andrews wouldn't be cleared to compete due to the injuries he sustained. Guess that meant his stay in Havana would end a few days shorter than he expected; but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing in his eyes.
A moment later the camera would fast forward, transitioning from a shot of T.V. leisurely strolling with his Latin beauties to the certifiable heavyweight laying on his side on a beach towel. The waves could be heard crashing onto the shore behind him, the cascading azure ocean prominent in the background.
Theo Vega: You know... you remind me of someone in Golden Gate Wrestling.
T.V. snaps his fingers several times try to recall the man's name, one of many that he's sent packing over the last year in a half; never to be seen again. In GGW in particular he was known for sending two opponents packing, never to be seen or heard from again and this was without even trying. Finally the light bulb clicked as he pointed to the camera.
Theo Vega: That Stone guy. You know now that I think about it the resemblances between the two of you are uncanny. I mean both of you were huge in the stone age when Fred Flintstone would take his little bambina Pebbles to go play with Barney the Dinosaur and the rest of the cave kids and Toby Keith was still considered relevant. Back in your prime they just called Old Yeller “Yeller” and just like Stone you see MSW with diamonds in your eyes; one last chance to relive the glory days before you ride off into that sunset.
His eyes widen as he grins in a very sarcastic, insincere manner. His hands were animated in an exaggerated, near comical fashion as he laid on his side on the beach towel.
Theo Vega: “But Mr. TV Time! Imma only 32! It's not how old you are but it's how old you feel and I feel like I'm 132 ahw-mee-goh.”
He chuckled as he mocked Duke's Michigan accent, right down to how he'd probably botch the Spanish language.
Theo Vega: Every week you're moving just a little bit slower, you manage to pack just a little bit less power behind that punch, and I can see it in your eyes Bambino; every Unstoppable you seem to be more tired than the last. You can't keep up anymore, your miles are showing up on your speedometer and you're destined for the scrap heap. And yet you still think you're a spring chicken when in reality your goose is about cooked!
But they say that your mind is the first thing to go in old age, right? So just think of the kick I got back in the hotel room after a night on the town when Ole Yeller himself was giving his old sob story to one of the McMillion boys; well either that or his budding dementia caused him to ramble to Juanita at the Cantina? I don't know and I'm not even sure he even remembers either.
He shook his head as he laughed. This old man might as well be punch drunk on top of the other ailments that are racking up to look more like a grocery list than a doctor's assessment.
Theo Vega: You have the cajones to tell me to be a man? Maybe I knocked your head too far off its axis but the tape shows that you were the one looking to get involved with the Danny and Donny because the Good Ole Boys were getting their asses handed to them like a pair of putas. You were the one looking to get involved and you say I can't handle myself in the ring without mi amigos? I made sure you didn't get involved, don't try to spin this one on me El Presidente Del Gringo. I should be asking you to be a man and tell the McMillion boys to stay away unless you want to seem them erased. You know what? It doesn't matter, bring your security blanket down to the ring; that Keyboard Warrior Drew Stevenson, King Chihuahua himself already seems to have tossed you aside like the broken toy you are.
You think I need back up to handle the Epitome of Extinction? Michigan's Favorite Grandpa?
His eyes widen as he brought his hands up close to his face, feigning shock and horror as he wiggled this fingers out in front of him.
Theo Vega: Why don't you ask Logan Brock after I planted him through a table? Why don't you ask Tracy Race after I sent him packing to the Shady Shoals Retirement Home. Why don't you ask Mr. Stone and Pretty Boy about their trip down by the bay? Don't flatter yourself Bambino because when the Sin City Slicer sets his targets on someone? He slices and dices them up and you don't hear about them anymore after. You can try to steal from Father Time but you can't steal from me; if I want you gone you'll disappear quietly into the night, loaded on a stretcher.
The two Latin beauties return to Theo's side, a pair of beautiful brunettes. One has a lighter while the other has a box of Montecristo #2 Cuban Cigars, the latter he planned to bring several boxes back with him to the Capital Crew. With the box held open T.V. grabs a cigar, placing it between his lips as the other beauty flicks open the silver top of the lighter before striking the flint wheel and holding the flame up to the cigar. Theo takes a few puffs as the incredible combination of spices and smooth creamy taste of the smoke fills his lungs before he blows out a ring of smoke followed by a stream of smoke that penetrates the circle near dead center.
Theo Vega: But I'll send Frankie, Danny, Donny, and Barrel your regards. You're not two steps ahead, you've got two feet in the grave! You want a war? Be careful for what you ask for because I'm going to put you down like the chihuahua you are.
Theo Vega with his left hand takes the cigar out of his mouth while his right hand reaches for the match resting on his ear. T.V. strikes it against his tongue before flicking it right at the camera and by extension Duke Andrews.
A moment later the camera would fast forward, transitioning from a shot of T.V. leisurely strolling with his Latin beauties to the certifiable heavyweight laying on his side on a beach towel. The waves could be heard crashing onto the shore behind him, the cascading azure ocean prominent in the background.
Theo Vega: You know... you remind me of someone in Golden Gate Wrestling.
T.V. snaps his fingers several times try to recall the man's name, one of many that he's sent packing over the last year in a half; never to be seen again. In GGW in particular he was known for sending two opponents packing, never to be seen or heard from again and this was without even trying. Finally the light bulb clicked as he pointed to the camera.
Theo Vega: That Stone guy. You know now that I think about it the resemblances between the two of you are uncanny. I mean both of you were huge in the stone age when Fred Flintstone would take his little bambina Pebbles to go play with Barney the Dinosaur and the rest of the cave kids and Toby Keith was still considered relevant. Back in your prime they just called Old Yeller “Yeller” and just like Stone you see MSW with diamonds in your eyes; one last chance to relive the glory days before you ride off into that sunset.
His eyes widen as he grins in a very sarcastic, insincere manner. His hands were animated in an exaggerated, near comical fashion as he laid on his side on the beach towel.
Theo Vega: “But Mr. TV Time! Imma only 32! It's not how old you are but it's how old you feel and I feel like I'm 132 ahw-mee-goh.”
He chuckled as he mocked Duke's Michigan accent, right down to how he'd probably botch the Spanish language.
Theo Vega: Every week you're moving just a little bit slower, you manage to pack just a little bit less power behind that punch, and I can see it in your eyes Bambino; every Unstoppable you seem to be more tired than the last. You can't keep up anymore, your miles are showing up on your speedometer and you're destined for the scrap heap. And yet you still think you're a spring chicken when in reality your goose is about cooked!
But they say that your mind is the first thing to go in old age, right? So just think of the kick I got back in the hotel room after a night on the town when Ole Yeller himself was giving his old sob story to one of the McMillion boys; well either that or his budding dementia caused him to ramble to Juanita at the Cantina? I don't know and I'm not even sure he even remembers either.
He shook his head as he laughed. This old man might as well be punch drunk on top of the other ailments that are racking up to look more like a grocery list than a doctor's assessment.
Theo Vega: You have the cajones to tell me to be a man? Maybe I knocked your head too far off its axis but the tape shows that you were the one looking to get involved with the Danny and Donny because the Good Ole Boys were getting their asses handed to them like a pair of putas. You were the one looking to get involved and you say I can't handle myself in the ring without mi amigos? I made sure you didn't get involved, don't try to spin this one on me El Presidente Del Gringo. I should be asking you to be a man and tell the McMillion boys to stay away unless you want to seem them erased. You know what? It doesn't matter, bring your security blanket down to the ring; that Keyboard Warrior Drew Stevenson, King Chihuahua himself already seems to have tossed you aside like the broken toy you are.
You think I need back up to handle the Epitome of Extinction? Michigan's Favorite Grandpa?
His eyes widen as he brought his hands up close to his face, feigning shock and horror as he wiggled this fingers out in front of him.
Theo Vega: Why don't you ask Logan Brock after I planted him through a table? Why don't you ask Tracy Race after I sent him packing to the Shady Shoals Retirement Home. Why don't you ask Mr. Stone and Pretty Boy about their trip down by the bay? Don't flatter yourself Bambino because when the Sin City Slicer sets his targets on someone? He slices and dices them up and you don't hear about them anymore after. You can try to steal from Father Time but you can't steal from me; if I want you gone you'll disappear quietly into the night, loaded on a stretcher.
The two Latin beauties return to Theo's side, a pair of beautiful brunettes. One has a lighter while the other has a box of Montecristo #2 Cuban Cigars, the latter he planned to bring several boxes back with him to the Capital Crew. With the box held open T.V. grabs a cigar, placing it between his lips as the other beauty flicks open the silver top of the lighter before striking the flint wheel and holding the flame up to the cigar. Theo takes a few puffs as the incredible combination of spices and smooth creamy taste of the smoke fills his lungs before he blows out a ring of smoke followed by a stream of smoke that penetrates the circle near dead center.
Theo Vega: But I'll send Frankie, Danny, Donny, and Barrel your regards. You're not two steps ahead, you've got two feet in the grave! You want a war? Be careful for what you ask for because I'm going to put you down like the chihuahua you are.
Theo Vega with his left hand takes the cigar out of his mouth while his right hand reaches for the match resting on his ear. T.V. strikes it against his tongue before flicking it right at the camera and by extension Duke Andrews.
