Bomb Squad (A Cocheese/Vega Joint)

The scene opens up in the Nation's Capital once again at U Street Northwest. T.V. and Cocheese are sitting in a 2 door 2008 Silver Toyota Camry Solara listening to the police scanner and enjoying some food from Ben's Chili. Cocheese is sitting in the driver's seat wearing a black fitted cap on backwards, a black t-shirt with 'Anacostia Got Dat Work' in cursive writing with wads of money under it, all airbrushed onto the shirt, denim jeans and black Vans. T.V. was wearing a pair of denim jeans, black Nikes, a black Jimi Hendrix "Are You Experienced" t-shirt and a black and white bandana tied on his head.

“We've got a 10-89 in progress on U Street Metro Station at 13th & U.”

“10-4, SWAT team is en-route to your location.”

“We've established a perimeter around and evacuated the surrounding area. Standing by for further orders.”

“10-4”

T.V. placed his burger down for a moment on a brown paper bag resting on his lap as he retrieved his Montecristo #2 resting in the ashtray, tapping a clump of ashes into the tray accumulating at the tip.

"D.C.'s got some pretty good food I gotta admit. Nothing like a burger and some smokes to pass some time. Especially when a couple of loco boys are looking to put on a Fourth of July fireworks display downtown. And I ain't even talking about that little family reunion between Psycho Michael and Battered Chris. If I didn't know any better I'd think Badger Boy called in the bomb threat on his own warehouse!"

"I know, right? These half-smokes are the best! I'm telling you, Ben's Chili Bowl. Next you gotta try Mumbo Sauce."

Cocheese takes a moment to look through the windshield of his rental car.

"That bomb threat is right across the street. Isn't that some shit?"

"Speaking of some shit, how about Badger Boy thinking his balls have suddenly decided to drop? Congratulations Bambino, you've just hit puberty!"

With a chuckle he raises the cigar up to his lips as he breathes in a sizable amount of smoke into his lungs before exhaling the creamy white smoke like jet engine exhaust.

"He finally decides to come out swinging for once instead of trudging along with his tail tucked between his legs; too bad he's already striking out. Look at you Roadkill, trying to be all edgy hearkening back to the RWD and the brief time we knew each other. You try to kiss Frankie's ass saying he had creativity but that I was a “Yes Man”? If we're going to talk RWD let's tell the truth, the whole truth. Back then I barely knew you and I saw the promotion as an opportunity but I also didn't like how you were running your ship. Even back then you were more focused on chasing Washington and trying to chase some senseless “Best of Five” series for “bragging rights” or something. You neglected your ship with your own vendetta and I didn't want to be part of that and I wasn't going to play by your rules. So Barrel and I, we started doing things our way. Remember Matt Baily, the little gimp stooge you sat down at the table? We took his leg and beat him with it and I still have that as a trophy to this very day. It's a shame your little experiment faded away before we got a real chance to show what we were made of because we might have actually been able to save your sinking ship from cancellation."

T.V. takes another few puffs off the cigar and exhales another white jet of smoke before placing it back in the ashtray.

"You think it's just for show when the cameras are running? Nah, pendejo this is as real as it gets. We bonded down in Mexico; Frankie, Danny, Donny, Barrel, and I and we're as tight off screen as we are on. A bunch of guys never given their fair due nor the chance to take the ball and run with it; to see what we could do. You think Danny and Donny enjoy sitting in a prison cell? They're two hotshots from Rodeo Drive; they're used to chocolate fountains, dirt bikes and beautiful mamasitas. You going to sit there and say Barrel turned his back on us because he got injured and fucked his quad? Last I checked he made you and Chris his bitch on more than one occasion. You've got talent Tejón, I ain't gonna stoop to your level with some half-baked burial job but you've got no focus. You're all over the map and your recent results just show that you simply just don't have your act together. Capital Crew? W, W, and W. All we do is win."

"All we do is win and.. give them somethin shitty to say

They're always hatin

Until we... leave them shocked and embarrassed

like they just got caught masturbatin


They've been hatin since years passed

Now Let me.. tell you a little story

About how we... went against the originals

And they took our ass whoopin like it was mandatory


Now you got me...

Fuckin around and sharin my little allegory

Robert's expecting an ass kissin

But he ain't sharin the whole fuckin story


This ain't for the squeamish

Because my tale is quite gory

It starts with Badger running a fed

And ends with his broke ass payin alimony.


He thought his wrestling division

was always quite revolutionary

Until I... ran through the competition

And made them all seem like they was secondary


His title was mine and he knew that

And that was why he pulled the plug

That's why he continues to slander me

Like my grave is being dug


Talkin about my people are sheep

Like I got no real clout

He don't know my name rings out

Like striking the bell after the 3 count.


What's the amount

Of how many times he took a whoopin

From San Francisco to Missouri

Bet he's sick of Isaac's bookin


He's jealous of all my success

That's why he's tryin to roast

He knew he failed as a promoter

That's why he up and went ghost


Then he hooked up with two stooges

Like they Larry, Curly and Moe

Frontin like he's the leader

While Chris Williams is his hoe


But where does that leave Michael Smart?

Stupid like his name was Curly

You shoulda stayed home in the Chi

You ended your retirement too early


They want to take me off the menu?

Well I'm the main course meal

You STILL don't know what y'all gettin into

Let me tell y'all the deal


Burb Boyz' did get arrested

They holdin it down like real OGs

Barrel turned his back on us?

Yeah, right, bitch, please!


You ain't tearin down shit

You just makin yourself look corny

Do me a favor and call your girl

Cuz right now I'm feelin horny


Better make sure that is your son

Cuz I'm all up in Nikki nightly

And I ain't talkin about Venom

I made that boy find God Almighty


Capital Crew's still runnin deep

As God is my witness

Three men inside a warehouse

Didn't that put Gawker out of business?


My crew is more than me and Theo

You gon' find that out soon

You're steppin in O.K. Corral

And right now it's high noon.


Cuz I got shooters in my crew

I thought you saw in our last promo

Is your brain that rattled?

Do you need to watch in slo-mo?


You opened your mouth way too much

And you'll be leavin Missouri with regret

Cuz I make promises and come through

Better believe this ain't a bomb threat"

Cocheese glances at Vega, "You want some of my fries?" Cocheese offers the bag on his lap to Vega who takes a few and then Cocheese looks through the windshield again, across the busy street towards the Metro station.

Cocheese sighs, as the bomb threat across the street was just that, a threat.

"Doesn't it feel good, Badger?" He chuckles as his statement was just dripping in sarcasm. "You think we're supposed to be scared by your little psycho rant? Are our widdle feelings supposed to get hurt?" With his eyes wide he sarcastically brings his hands up to his face, wiggling his fingers in feigned shock and horror.

"Keep telling yourself that Psycho Michael and Battered Chris can put their differences aside because if you believe that for even a second? You've already lost the battle and the war and we're going to slaughter you like the animals you are. You can't claim to be a pack of monsters if you lack the killer instinct and you're starting down two ice cold ring assassins right here."

"So Robert wants to know what happened to the Capital Crew...?" He shrugs his shoulders. "I dunno." He lets that sink in. He then states. "I still wanna know what cereal Chris was eatin."