Post by ΒΑЯЯЕԼ on Jun 2, 2016 18:59:10 GMT -6
"I thought about your 'beta' comment a little deeper than I should have. I thought about shutting up and following the pecking order and I decided to use the ol' interweb and stumbled onto some very useful information. See Williams, I looked back at the history of Missouri State Wrestling and I noticed that you won the Pure 15 Trophy at Back to Basics and there was four shows that followed before the promotion went belly up. In those four shows you didn't defend the trophy ONCE."
Fixed in on the IMPURE Championship, we don't see Barrel. We can hear him clearly but he was no where in sight. The title looked beat up, it was dirty and looked to have pick up grunge from the wear and tear of being lugged around with The Big Badass. Despite not showcasing it every time he stepped on camera, the title wasn't too far out of reach.
"I've defended my IMPURE Title twice since I won it, so that already cements me as a way better champion than you ever was. But not only that- beta.. beta.. that's the pot calling the kettle black. You didn't do a damn thing to try and make the Pure 15 Trophy worthwhile, you didn't give it any prestige. In typical Williams choke-job fashion your knees buckled when the pressure came and you faded into the background while the MSW Champion at the time- Manning, took the promotion on his back and put a huge divide between you and he in terms being a champion. So who's the beta now? You had more than one chance to make yourself a commodity- a valuable commodity at that in MSW but each time you're given the chance you can't handle it. That's exactly why you're The Tryhard and not Mister Do It."
Using the side of his thumb to wipe a trace of grime away from the IMPURE Championship's title place Barrel continued to keep himself off camera as he was heard adjusting whatever chair he was sitting in with a creak.
"You notice that there's been no Frankie- no Theo, no Danny or Donny since this match was announced and IC3 tried to put the odds in your favor. An injured knee and banned finisher later and you STILL can't separate yourself from the pack- you had to go and include Badger in your title chase. You couldn't do it on your own- you knew that I could smell the blood in the water so you called Badger and was all.."
Pausing for a second- Barrel cleared his throat and with the camera still focused on the IMPURE Championship he spoke in a more nasally tone.
"Hey Rob, Barrel is kicking my freakin' butt here so why don't you help me out? Jump on camera and try to be funny, make sure that you take some heat off of me because the people surely have gotten tired of me. I think it's my Tryhard nature, they don't wanna see it anymore. But Rob it's all I have, I can't close the deal man. Please be funny, insert some charisma into a promo for me while I run around taking laps and make this face like I haven't drank water in a month and can't squeeze a turd out of my ass. Thanks Robby, love you lots bro!"
Barrel fired off a chuckle.
"I never included my boys in my work, I don't need them. I never needed to call Frankie and ask for advice on how to beat you- why would I? What do you offer that makes you any different than anyone else I've mowed down in the past? That's the one thing you don't understand- I don't care how much this fabled 'monster' you speak of wants to come out to play, it's not gonna be enough because YOU don't have enough. If you aren't already you should be questioning the amount of heart you've got left in the tank since returning. I wasn't joking when I said you came back hot but now.. not so much. You've lost momentum and now you're trying to latch onto me like a goddamned tapeworm and feed off of what I got but guess what Chris.. that ends on Unstoppable. Consider me a raw dose of vinegar that's gonna not just drown you out you punkass parasite but flush you out and show your true colors.. but it's not like you haven't done that for me already."
Finally the camera moved backwards as Barrel was seen with an asian broad standing behind him rubbing his shoulders. Dressed in a nice little halter-top, she dug her fingers into Barrel's tree-stump like neck as he reclined back on the red colored Lay-Zee boy as he puffed on a cigar, one out of Theo's vaulted collection more than likely. With his right knee extended out and an ice-packed tied around it, this was the first time the injury was showed on camera as a pair of black and white plaid cargo shorts cut off right before the knee showcased the swelling that was definitely still apparent. As if there wasn't a care in the world, Barrel tilted his head back a bit and let the Asian woman work her way up to his ears before she eventually dug her fingers into his freshly skinned head as he let the smoke out of his mouth.
"You're supposed to be this 'never say quit' kinda guy yet you're too focused on wondering why I made a pledge to keep Frankie's back clean from bums like you. All I heard this week was how Frankie was this- Frankie was that- bruh, the mistake you've made since the first promo you cut was worrying way too much what Cocheese is doing right now. I pegged you as a Theo admirer but I was wrong, I think you're not just fascinated with The Don.. you're OBSESSED with him. Then again that'd explain your relationship with Garland as he's obviously obsessed with Washington, it's probably what draws you two together. Luke Jackson is just that vanilla cream in the middle of that dysfunctional Oreo Cookie but it won't matter after Unstoppable because you set yourself up for a fall that's way harder than it should have been."
As the asian woman worked her way beneath Barrel's head, she massaged deep near his throat and then under his chin as that brought him to a pause. With his head tilted back he took another puff of the cigar as another asian woman, this one a bit more slender with jet black hair and a white work apron popped up and begun to slowly and very carefully work out his knee. Not directly, more on the side area as she made her way up the side near his thigh but went back down eventually.
"You've tried so hard to knock me down, to peg me as this jailhouse bitch that when it's all said and done at Unstoppable there's no coming back from me successfully defending my IMPURE Title at your expense. How do you explain losing to that bullied beta as you claimed I was? How do you repair your image after allllllllllllll the hype and talk you put in fails and you prove to be exactly what I said you were- a Tryhard? Think about that for a second."
Of course this wouldn't be a Barrel production without him fulfilling his sweet tooth as the asian massagist who was responsible for working on his neck and shoulders had taken a quick break to reach into a plastic container and grab hold of a strawberry on the top of several others. Dipping it into a jar of Nutella, Barrel tilted his head back as she fed it to The Big Badass as she used her pinky to clean off some that was captured on his goatee.
"While you're playing Touch Butt with Garland in a bathroom I was getting a massage from Missouri's finest fingers. My career isn't just better than yours Williams, my life is ten times what you'll have. Not only do I know without a shadow of a doubt I've got four guys that would take a bullet for me if need be ready to pounce- I've got money.. I've got a blossoming career and I've got this-"
With his free hand Barrel grabbed hold of the IMPURE Title and took a second to glance at it before turning his head back to the camera.
"Gold seems to send the weak into a frenzy. You'll fail in the end though- but don't worry. You'll always.. ALWAYS get an "A" for "AFFORT!"
"Honey I think it's effort."
"It is 'effort' but 'AFFORT' sounds much better."
"So long as you tip me well, you can word it how you want."
"Trust that I'm taking you down and showing who the god damn ALPHA of Pure or IMPURE Champs past and present is. Cut the goddamn feed."
DONE.
Fixed in on the IMPURE Championship, we don't see Barrel. We can hear him clearly but he was no where in sight. The title looked beat up, it was dirty and looked to have pick up grunge from the wear and tear of being lugged around with The Big Badass. Despite not showcasing it every time he stepped on camera, the title wasn't too far out of reach.
"I've defended my IMPURE Title twice since I won it, so that already cements me as a way better champion than you ever was. But not only that- beta.. beta.. that's the pot calling the kettle black. You didn't do a damn thing to try and make the Pure 15 Trophy worthwhile, you didn't give it any prestige. In typical Williams choke-job fashion your knees buckled when the pressure came and you faded into the background while the MSW Champion at the time- Manning, took the promotion on his back and put a huge divide between you and he in terms being a champion. So who's the beta now? You had more than one chance to make yourself a commodity- a valuable commodity at that in MSW but each time you're given the chance you can't handle it. That's exactly why you're The Tryhard and not Mister Do It."
Using the side of his thumb to wipe a trace of grime away from the IMPURE Championship's title place Barrel continued to keep himself off camera as he was heard adjusting whatever chair he was sitting in with a creak.
"You notice that there's been no Frankie- no Theo, no Danny or Donny since this match was announced and IC3 tried to put the odds in your favor. An injured knee and banned finisher later and you STILL can't separate yourself from the pack- you had to go and include Badger in your title chase. You couldn't do it on your own- you knew that I could smell the blood in the water so you called Badger and was all.."
Pausing for a second- Barrel cleared his throat and with the camera still focused on the IMPURE Championship he spoke in a more nasally tone.
"Hey Rob, Barrel is kicking my freakin' butt here so why don't you help me out? Jump on camera and try to be funny, make sure that you take some heat off of me because the people surely have gotten tired of me. I think it's my Tryhard nature, they don't wanna see it anymore. But Rob it's all I have, I can't close the deal man. Please be funny, insert some charisma into a promo for me while I run around taking laps and make this face like I haven't drank water in a month and can't squeeze a turd out of my ass. Thanks Robby, love you lots bro!"
Barrel fired off a chuckle.
"I never included my boys in my work, I don't need them. I never needed to call Frankie and ask for advice on how to beat you- why would I? What do you offer that makes you any different than anyone else I've mowed down in the past? That's the one thing you don't understand- I don't care how much this fabled 'monster' you speak of wants to come out to play, it's not gonna be enough because YOU don't have enough. If you aren't already you should be questioning the amount of heart you've got left in the tank since returning. I wasn't joking when I said you came back hot but now.. not so much. You've lost momentum and now you're trying to latch onto me like a goddamned tapeworm and feed off of what I got but guess what Chris.. that ends on Unstoppable. Consider me a raw dose of vinegar that's gonna not just drown you out you punkass parasite but flush you out and show your true colors.. but it's not like you haven't done that for me already."
Finally the camera moved backwards as Barrel was seen with an asian broad standing behind him rubbing his shoulders. Dressed in a nice little halter-top, she dug her fingers into Barrel's tree-stump like neck as he reclined back on the red colored Lay-Zee boy as he puffed on a cigar, one out of Theo's vaulted collection more than likely. With his right knee extended out and an ice-packed tied around it, this was the first time the injury was showed on camera as a pair of black and white plaid cargo shorts cut off right before the knee showcased the swelling that was definitely still apparent. As if there wasn't a care in the world, Barrel tilted his head back a bit and let the Asian woman work her way up to his ears before she eventually dug her fingers into his freshly skinned head as he let the smoke out of his mouth.
"You're supposed to be this 'never say quit' kinda guy yet you're too focused on wondering why I made a pledge to keep Frankie's back clean from bums like you. All I heard this week was how Frankie was this- Frankie was that- bruh, the mistake you've made since the first promo you cut was worrying way too much what Cocheese is doing right now. I pegged you as a Theo admirer but I was wrong, I think you're not just fascinated with The Don.. you're OBSESSED with him. Then again that'd explain your relationship with Garland as he's obviously obsessed with Washington, it's probably what draws you two together. Luke Jackson is just that vanilla cream in the middle of that dysfunctional Oreo Cookie but it won't matter after Unstoppable because you set yourself up for a fall that's way harder than it should have been."
As the asian woman worked her way beneath Barrel's head, she massaged deep near his throat and then under his chin as that brought him to a pause. With his head tilted back he took another puff of the cigar as another asian woman, this one a bit more slender with jet black hair and a white work apron popped up and begun to slowly and very carefully work out his knee. Not directly, more on the side area as she made her way up the side near his thigh but went back down eventually.
"You've tried so hard to knock me down, to peg me as this jailhouse bitch that when it's all said and done at Unstoppable there's no coming back from me successfully defending my IMPURE Title at your expense. How do you explain losing to that bullied beta as you claimed I was? How do you repair your image after allllllllllllll the hype and talk you put in fails and you prove to be exactly what I said you were- a Tryhard? Think about that for a second."
Of course this wouldn't be a Barrel production without him fulfilling his sweet tooth as the asian massagist who was responsible for working on his neck and shoulders had taken a quick break to reach into a plastic container and grab hold of a strawberry on the top of several others. Dipping it into a jar of Nutella, Barrel tilted his head back as she fed it to The Big Badass as she used her pinky to clean off some that was captured on his goatee.
"While you're playing Touch Butt with Garland in a bathroom I was getting a massage from Missouri's finest fingers. My career isn't just better than yours Williams, my life is ten times what you'll have. Not only do I know without a shadow of a doubt I've got four guys that would take a bullet for me if need be ready to pounce- I've got money.. I've got a blossoming career and I've got this-"
With his free hand Barrel grabbed hold of the IMPURE Title and took a second to glance at it before turning his head back to the camera.
"Gold seems to send the weak into a frenzy. You'll fail in the end though- but don't worry. You'll always.. ALWAYS get an "A" for "AFFORT!"
"Honey I think it's effort."
"It is 'effort' but 'AFFORT' sounds much better."
"So long as you tip me well, you can word it how you want."
"Trust that I'm taking you down and showing who the god damn ALPHA of Pure or IMPURE Champs past and present is. Cut the goddamn feed."
DONE.
