Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2014 7:54:12 GMT -6
While out on the trail after dropping off the heard at a slaughter house Yugo makes his way into town on the back of his trusty steed, Pinto Inferno where they stop at one of those seedy magazine shops that sell ever magazine you could imagine from everywhere. Oh and they sell beer. And smokes. Yugo ties Pinto up outside as he unmounts and walks inside of this fine establishment.
The front door was already open but it has one of the lasers shooting across the doorway and when you walk in it sounds off a high pitched annoying alarm to most likely wake up the old timer behind the counter. As Yugo enters the building the bells and whistles sound and the guy behind the counter jumps too.
They make eye contact.
Yugo nods and touches the tip of his hat.
"What cya lookin' fer today young fellow?"
The front of the counter is full of shelves which is stocked with all sorts of candy. Yugo spots a box of sweets he hasn't seen in a while. He reaches down and picks up a small box of Juju beans and tosses them on the counter.
"Them. Some Skoal long leaf and the latest copy of High Society."
The old timer behind the counter chuckles.
"Don't you mean Playboy? Penthouse? Swank? Hell how about Hustler?"
"Nope. High Society."
"Kid. No one reads that mag no more. Hell I got tired of sending them back so it is one of the few magazines that I stopped carrying. Now granted there was a time when High Society was in. A premier seller but those days are long gone. Hell these kids today don't even know there used to be a magazine named High Society."
"So you are telling me High Society went out?"
"Oh no. You can go to their web site if you want I guess. But with so much free porn on the net why pay for it? It's nothing special anymore."
The old time tosses a can of chew on the counter and rings Yugo up.
"It's nothing special anymore. I couldn't have said it better."
*Some time later*
Yugo is standing in a old run down barn over looking the country side. Yugo pops the very last Juju bean in his mouth and enjoys the sugary goodness as he slowly steps out of the barn.
"Sometime you just see someone. You hear someone talk and everything you thought of them is confirmed."
Yugo hooks the thumbs around his belt buckle.
"Ian Windermear is, with out a shadow of a doubt, make no bones about it and you can take it to the bank, was dropped on his head as a kid. He is correct in saying that Bonecrushing Phailous is indeed unstoppable. We are everything you say we are and then some. There isn't a team in the MSW that can stop us. There isn't a team in the MSW that can slow us down. Hell son. There isn't a team in the MSW that can contain us. Just ask your sister. She tried to contain Yugo Phailous."
Yugo cups the one side of his mouth and leans towards the camera.
"And it blew up in her face if you know what I mean."
Yugo adjusts his hat.
"We're not just taking over the MSW. We're not just going to rule the MSW. Johnny and Yugo. We will own this god forsaken hell hole in middle of Missouri. Every fly by night tag team that dares to enter the MSW including you two self center rejects will be bitch slapped, hogged tied and left for dead on the side of the road. Inside that ring, money can't buy wins. But I'm sure you two are already discovering that huh?"
Yugo again cups the side of his mouth and leans towards the camera.
"But money can buy your mom Leo, But you already knew that huh?"
Yugo reaches in his back pocket and pulls out a rolled up magazine.
"I had to stop at I don't know how many garage sales before I found one of these. A copy of High Society."
Yugo unrolls the early 80's edition of High Society.
"It cost me a buck and I got some strange looks when I picked it up but the destroyer of hymens is always looking for some vintage stuff to add to the collection. You know something to flip through when I am sitting on the can dropping a deuce and much like dropping the kids off at the lake, that is what has happened to this once proud magazine. There was a time when everyone was reading High Society. There was a time when it was on the lips and minds of the nation. But it couldn't keep up with the times, it refused to change and it got left behind. It became outdated. Now, who am I to say that something is...."
Yugo shrugs.
"is well lame but Leo Banks, Ian Wintermute is just that. Lame. They are just some rehashed old way of thinking that just because you were left a nice bank roll from your grandfather when he dropped dead that will equal success in the ring but look at me. I don't have a dollar to my name and I'm about to win the MSW Tag Team titles. You could only just wish something like that would happen to you Leo. Yugo Phailous doesn't have a big fancy name, a huge ass house that costs a fortune. All I need is my horse Pinto and a wide open plain."
Yugo leans in towards the camera.
"And a nice spread from time to time if you know what I mean."
Yugo takes the magazine and tosses it over his shoulder.
"When that bell rings and this match is over with you will have more than just a stray hair to worry about in your hot tub. You will have to worry is all of the black and blues you're fixin' to get will all fit in that hot tub of yours. If you have a problem with Johnny, then you have a problem with me, Yugo Phailous. I always wanted to beat down a money grubbing douche like you and by golly, that is what is going to happen this week for I am Yugo Phailous."
Yugo touches the tip of his hat.
"And death is following me."
Fade out.
